Katy Perry makes me feel like putting a plastic bag over her head. So, close.

No shit: The whole point of life is to figure out a way you can create a comfortable private place to fuck; First your parents cockblock, then your kids get in on it.

That's hilarious. Your TMI absolutely gives your "never peed" statement some credibility. I'm glad the mouse was the dealbreaker. Something really extra gross about that. I mean, lizards kind of shrivel up but a mouse would be all bloated and squishy...

We save our prudery for others. I can pool sex all I want, but I'll sure as hell look down on my neighbors for doing the same!

That is why sexually adventurous and experienced adults take that shit out of the water and onto a dryish surface of some kind when shit goes past the point of no return. Good for them, but there's really no reason to have full-on penetrative pool sex as a adult sex-haver, as many have stated here. Could it be that…

I don't know about sandy, but who has two thumbs and hates a salty vagina? This girl.

Well, I doubt that either of his parents is actually capable of producing enough ejaculate to taint the chlorinated pool. (Ejaculate and taint in one sentence. How many points do I get?) Which I'm sure they'd be happy to let him know if he told them why he doesn't want to go in the pool.
That being said, teenagers are…

You also just know that this dude would be completely comfortable fucking people in there himself and expecting his parents to swim in it after.

I can tell I'm an Old now because I sympathize much more with how freaking hard it is to save up enough money for a house, especially one with a damn swimming pool, than the plight of the grossed out teen who GETS TO HAVE A SWIMMING POOL IN HIS BACKYARD. Spoiled little jerk. Chlorine kills everything. Enjoy your…

I don't think it sounds like there's any more to this story at all. The clinic director very clearly has an agenda, and is equally clearly horrified at the idea that "some single woman" might be able to create a mixed race child he doesn't believe should exist. That he managed to dig up one case from five years ago…

I'm not going to defend this clinic's practices, but I do think you are comparing apples to oranges. Being black or brown in America (and I realize this story is from Canada but there are parallels) means learning a very specific set of lessons. This includes trivial stuff like skin and hair differences, and really…

Understand that when I say "I farted," it's an understatement akin to describing the Arctic Circle as "a place where you should probably bring a jacket." Mine was not some demure, coquettish poot, but a nuclear apocalypse trumpet that heralded the arrival of the four horsemen.

Here's the thing, though: people use those statistics as a way to stigmatize and further marginalize a population that faces those issues due to intergenerational trauma (as opposed to some intrinsic quality that predisposes them to poverty or alcoholism). The problem is a societal one but is typically seen as a way…

You lose credibility when you attempt to argue that the word threat only means credible threat. He threatened it. You don't think the threat was credible, and you may have a point (although his later "I'm going to come to your place of business" tweet undermines your position), but that doesn't erase the threat.

Comcast's new album, Ryan, drops next week.

But wait, can we go back to the on-demand abortion thing? Does xfinity offer that?

Yup, or else they'd be okay with better sex-ed, free BC, access to the morning-after pill, anti-rape education and legislation, and all the other things that would reduce the number of abortions necessary in the first place.

They can call me when they have any genuine concern for embryos as well. Let's not pretend for a moment this isn't all about punishing women for having sex.

Oddly enough, it only became a moral issue in the 80's, when Jerry Falwell and his cronies started telling everyone it was bad. Until then it was essentially a Catholic position, with some evangelicals going so far as to say quote, "God does not consider the fetus a soul, no matter how far gestation has progressed"

And what science is that you speak of? External uteri a la Brave New World?