D’Brickashaw Ferguson.

In bad Spanish, sure. Good Spanish would be “Alma Mia.” Otherwise it’s MI alma. It’s my mother tongue and what I make my living with as a translator.

Besides being a gross sexist asshole, Perez Hilton does not know Spanish. It’s supposed to be “mi alma,” not “mia alma." Idiot.

I get that her manager was trying to heel her bruised ego. But I'm glad I didn't have to foot the bill. She must be pretty pumped now.

You know how some people put potato chips into sandwiches for texture and taste? What I want to know is, can I put breadsticks in my breadstick sandwiches? This is important.

Mmmm. Breadsticks are like gay sex.

PREACH.

My ideal day is:

....what? Morning sex is the best for so many reasons!! First thing after I wake up is literally the only time my brain isn’t whizzing in a zillion different directions, so I’m much more relaxed and into getting sexy. I’m also not exhausted/exasperated from dealing with bullshit all day. It’s a good reason to stay in…

“I find it particularly ironic...that the anti-abortion community would choose to use one of the staples of murder, actual bombs, to spread their pro-life message.”

The only reason Ryan Reynolds should be betwixt my thighs, holding my ankles, and telling me to push, is so I can loosen up enough to take the girth of his man parts into my delicate flower.

I was going with: In related news the rapper Tyga has announced that he will now be known as School. But, yeah, designer drug.

What a coincidence, because I was thinking about Idris Elba when I broke my own speed record.

I don’t know. (Clutches Purls). I mean she clearly states, she is high as fuck, she acts as if she is high as fuck, and the Kardashian/Jenner clans aren’t know as ACTORS. So I just don’t know.

Just saw this. I think Blac Chyna posted it:

YOU ARE NOT! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL AND WONDERFUL AND LOVED.

He's probably scared to leave. I know I would be!

Smith was already on a deferred sentence for attacking another one of her husband’s exes back in February.

Who wore it best?