Look, if I'm Mitch McConnell, I'm thinking "who doesn't want this dick?"

That your mother secretly hates you.

Sorry, I had my hearing aids out. What was it you were saying?

It'll be a white guy. Come on, did you really think that they'd cast an Asian?

Jeff Foxworthy.

It takes a lot to make a stew
A pinch of salt and laughter too
A scoop of kids to add the spice
A dash of love to make it nice, and you got
Too many Churchills, too many Churchills
Too many Churchills, too many Churchills
Too many Churchills, too many Churchills!

The House of Cards team also got posthumous nods, though it's technically after their show died creatively

You've cracked it. That was the whole point of the season.

The Virgin Suicide Squad?

Once again, it seems that filmmakers willfully neglect the cinematic possibilities that come with including music by Limp Bizkit.

I know I'm sounding like a broken record, but it must still be noted that Mike Pence electroshocks his balls in an attempt to suppress gay thoughts.

Did your neighbor's half sister also record any fecal matter? Because if not, this thread cannot help you.

My brother once took my camcorder and recorded a poo in the toilet on it. If I can find it, it seems like the perfect video for this artistic vehicle.

Why the hell is he always doing something stupid with his hands? That header image looks like he's talking into a small, invisible phone. Is it dementia, or is he trying to shake Putin's jizz out of his ear?

Indeed, I am a self-hating Lizaros.

In theory, the logic is sound. But I have a feeling that the result would be something akin to Jurassic Park-level genetic fusing.

Mom?

Does "hope" still have the same meaning anymore?

Guys, relax. Between all the boner pills, yelling, and mainlining of chicken grease into his veins, Alex Jones will be one of 2017's finest victims.

"That makes no fucking sense on several levels."