Oh, that makes so much more sense! I thought she had just broken a nail or something and didn't want to show any imperfections.

Why the hell is that owner allowing his/her kitten on the kitchen counter? That cat poops in a box then covers up his poop with the same paws that he uses to jump up onto your counter where you make your dinner. Ew ew ew.

This is a real thing that happened:

In college, my roommate worked at a restaurant run by a divorced middleaged woman. One night my roommate got a great tip and told her boss about it, "Dude! He gave me, like $30!" and didn't give her phrasing a second thought.

Doesn't gorilla sex (I mean, gorilla LOVE MAKING) onlu last for like 15 seconds. Way to set the bar, silverback!

I feel the same on days that I telecommute (which is all the days), but I can't justify spending $25 on a desk and internet for one day when my local not-Starbucks will give me the same for the price of an iced coffee.

They speakin' AMERICAN. Take that "English" back to the Queen, you socialist!!!

I would really like it if everyone stopped saying "vajayjay" and replaced it with "TSA."

I think that's one of the DVD extras.

Best party favor ever!