After drinking approximately 2 gallons of Bud Light.

Sort of like Manic Pixie Dream Girl in that the character has no motivations of their own, they simply exist to make the main character’s life better.

They’re in a ziploc bag so the prayers stay nice and fresh. Can’t have stale prayers, you know.

Cry harder, snowflake.

And god! The picture! Him with his cheesy grin and thumbs up looking like he just handed out a Publishers Clearinghouse check. No sense of decorum.

He may actually just explode into a mass of maggots some day.

If someone on SNAP buys junk: “How dare they use MUH TAXES to get fat!”

I have a friend who got that snide little comment for using WIC checks...for her foster children. She’s taking care of three small children out of the kindness of her heart which I’m sure is much more than Mr. Arbiter of Who Deserves Welfare ever did.

And yet somehow, the rest of the world manages to consume the same media and not have these issues!

*whispers* the blacks

That’s fake news!!!!1 On the other hand, the picture of the guy in the communist t-shirt that looks nothing like the mug shot - that’s real!

The answer to traffic jams is MORE CARS!

I’ve also seen “let’s arm the teachers!!!!!1" nonsense. Conservatives think teachers are incompetent, lazy, greedy union thugs until something like this happens, then they’re the only things standing between a maniac and children, and should be excited to possibly die for $40,000 a year. At least they’ll call you a…

He’s ~obviously~ been brainwashed by the LIEberal media!

You guys are wonderful and give me so much hope <3

Yes, yes, and yes. I have a job I love, I’m getting married in October, I’m losing weight and getting fitter...and yet we’ve just crossed Europe off our honeymoon list because we don’t think we’re convincing enough to be fake Canadians.

Oh Louise...

Good luck. In my many playthroughs of DA:O, I still can’t resist Alistair. He’s just so cute and awkward...my little blood-spattered angel <3

Official Trump Crayon box: KKK White, MAGA Red, Burned Steak Black, GOOOOOOLD, Spray Tan Orange, Ill-Fitting Suit Blue, Beautiful Chocolate Cake Brown, Wife’s Bruises Purple.

I don’t know about dressage, most of those horses are black and brown!