“Can fall asleep anywhere” is very different from “falls asleep everywhere.”

They’re keeping the character’s true identity (John Masterchief) a secret, right?

My wife watched this one night while I was working in my office. Early on, I heard her crying and came out. “It’s very sad,” she said, sniffing beside a huge pile of Kleenex. Now it was a long time ago and I might be exaggerating, but I swear she cried for the whole damn movie.

Don’t get them started on normal art, art-art, and Art (with a capital A).

For me, the outdoor temperature limit is if it’s colder than 60 degrees, OR if it’s warmer than 50.

2/10
You forgot to mention how they always wear cloaks with wide hoods pulled down to cover their eyes, and how they always sit in a back booth, trying to generate an air of intrigue and mystery.

You could also form the cookies with a disher and they’ll be perfectly round balls to begin with...

He only told three people, and yet everyone knew he’d be in it...

I had a similar reaction to learning other kids didn’t eat generic jello mix by dipping carrots into it and licking it off. A poor man’s Lik-M-Aid / Fun Dip.

People... people were still using Safari?

Pretty sure the past tense of smite is “smote.”

Just go ahead and make that ‘11' into a ‘12,’ and add Horizon: Forbidden West. 

...“is really hard”...

This is true. In order for the audience to believe the meteor could be stopped, they would need a hunky action-star lead. 

Seconding Resistance and/or Avalon.

Seconding Resistance and/or Avalon.

Aw man, now I have to wait even longer to never see this movie.

Just drinking a lot of water before you go to bed tends to work wonders. I suppose that’s not so much a cure as a preventative, but it’s reliable and pretty brainless.

My son (9) has REPEATEDLY defeated app- and site-blocking software simply by tapping elements before the block kicks in.

1. AdBlock