You’re like my buddy who bought a 2005 Polaris Ranger UTV cheap and has since spent just about every weekend trying to make it run right. Dude is so cheap he makes Scrooge McDuck look like a spendthrift.

Depending on the item and who owned it and the circumstances of it being left behind, you always have the option of teabagging it before you give it back.

Never bought the premise.  Only terminally stupid adults would have.

Erased?  More like killing herself.  Lies on top of lies, hair-brained free everything plans with no concrete plans to pay for it, etc.

How in the hell is that fashion?  Who would wear it and where?

Disappointed there is no sound.  We totally missed the YEEEEHAAAA.

I’m gonna be the contrary voice here and say spend the money on doing stuff with your kids while you can.  They’ll remember daddy taking them to the mountains, the beach, wherever, a lot longer than you’ll enjoy that car.

Ignore them.  Don’t talk back.  Most people get the message.

Yes, how dare the plane representing America be painted red, white, and blue.  The horrors!

Bring back the J trucks or the Commanche and watch them roll off the lots as fast as they’re delivered.  When people said they wanted a Jeep truck they weren’t talking about taking a Wrangler and slapping a crappy bed on it.

Would argue that if that’s what breaks it, you shouldn’t have been together in the first place.

What to do?  Wave at them from the pre-check line and get a drink while you wait on the other side.

Why would I want to watch the Grammys in the first place?

Got ya hot and bothered did it?

Good.  I’ve had it with that crap on airplanes.  Lady about two years ago had a miniature pig that screamed for what seemed like 12 days.  (it was a 2 hour flight)

I don’t mind the white guys wearing cornrow wigs, but why are the wigs so shitty looking?

So where are you going?

I don’t think this is a “botched” procedure.  It was successful at doing what it was supposed to do.  The hair can be removed with laser hair removal treatments.

The walker is a nice touch; his lawyer must be from the Bill Cosby-is-blind school of defense tactics.

Nice clickbait title.