Now, let's say I did not miss the boat on VLC for my iPhone. Is it worth switching? VLC can be buggy sometimes, and I know it will never, ever get an update.

I took the meme to mean, "If you called someone's vagina this, you, sir or madam, would be an idiot." Which is to say, the insult is not aimed at the vagina, but, rather, the imaginary person who called it (her?) that name.

Well, I'm just glad we can now judge everyone associated with this story.

I call this "Last Cup Of Sorrow."

Thank you for that. I am sufficiently humbled, especially thinking of the restraint you have used your entire life to never pick a city/state/group of people at random for the purpose of a joke. You are a hero and an inspiration.

Not soon enough. I want to be able to walk to Ralph's without getting shoulder-checked by Iowans on holiday.

By, "Free" did you mean, "$19.99?"

Born (This Way) In Time

Kenley can throw her kitty at me any time.

Her and me both, Mercede.

This is my least favorite Scott Adams sockpuppet yet.

"Models of the Runway" felt like a DVD extra that got lucky. To the best of my knowledge, there haven't been any true spin-offs that have made it to air. I think "All Stars" has a decent shot, because even if the judges aren't there, people will still want to see, like, Santino vs. Jeffrey, or whatever.

I think it's worth noting that the Top Chef spin-offs (Top Chef Masters, Top Chef Just Desserts, Top Chef Secret Shame Night Eaters, etc.), all have hosts that aren't Padma Lakshmi. Here's the dialogue I have with myself every time this happens:

Finally, someone making sense around- HEYWAITAMINUTE

Yep. Even hate myself.