He didn’t say he didn’t want an SUV, he said he didn’t need an SUV, which is the case for 99 percent of SUV buyers.

I mean, couldn’t *one* of you have given him a reasonable answer?  The only non-troll answer is the Acadia, and he literally said he had no use for an SUV.  I get that there’s a comedy element, but I thought there were supposed to be a few helpful suggestions?

a baby that Sanders kindly asked to “keep that down a little bit” when they were shrieking.

If you’d read the Bible you’d remember when Shatner kills Raptor Jesus.

Can leftists stop pretending to like her now? She’s the worst combination of both frivolous and dangerous and the sooner she’s gone the better off we’ll be. It’s not that hard to articulate a case for reparations without also being an anti-vaxxer.

His punishment for assaulting a child is less than my last speeding ticket.

His punishment for assaulting a child is less than my last speeding ticket.

Meanwhile

I’m going to focus on one part of the story: the current mindset that it’s not rude at all to just whip out a smartphone whenever you feel like it.

Ray Ratto thinks every time a team wants a play reviewed, it should have to pay $1 million in cash on the spot to a local charity, or take the call it got and shut up about it.

Gotta love those free market, hands off government Republicans who will support the fact Trump just literally ordered companies to stop doing business with China. 

A strong counterpoint to which I have no rebuttal.

God the quotes thing gets me every time. Despite being on twitter for 32 hours a day the fucking asshole still hasn’t learned that using quotes in that fashion implies the exact opposite of what you are saying.

Fun(?) fact!

My three year old was asking me about sports team mascots recently and mentioned elephants and I said, “No, there’s not elephant teams.” And like 4 questions later I remembered the A’s and was like, “WAIT. LET’S GO BACK TO THE ELEPHANT THING.”

The A’s home whites are one of the nicest uniforms in baseball.

Gotta say, “proud to be a part if this film in ANY WAY!!!” is a hell of a take to have about American Beauty in 2019.

When you want to use “2 Many Chainz” and can’t quite find a place in your piece to make it work. 

How hard is it to just start monitoring 4chan users? This isn’t rocket science. Go to /pol.

If you get 100% and aren’t creeped out, the NSA recruiter would like to have a word with you about exciting ways to play the “sequel”.