I think I might be old.  

best known as the goofy, fun-loving bass player for The Monkees

We had a long talk about how fat wasn’t something you are, but rather just something that everyone has. Some people have more and some people have less. And I tried to talk to her about how she is strong and athletic and how her body does exactly what it’s supposed to.

First of all what kind of neanderthal chews on the metal part of a pencil?  

At least this person had a backup plan.

Bateman: Well that interview went really well.

“Positive interaction, rather than only being there when somebody’s getting arrested or somebody’s breaking the law,” officer Darren Derby told WNYT-13. “Kids remember that for a long time.”

Wiseau serious?

I don’t think the Soul Stone is in Wakanda. I think it will be missing until the third act of Avengers 4, after Thanos has collected all of the other Infinity Stones, and the Avengers are scrambling to find the last one before he can. At some point, Tony Stark will freak out, screaming, “If it’s not in Wakanda, where…

Wow.

Roy Moore doesn’t want to be fed... He wants to hunt!

• He scrapes the toppings off his pizza. “I never eat the dough,” he told US Weekly.

*farts*

A man walks into a bar, and sits down. He starts a conversation with an old guy next to him. The old guy has obviously had a few. He says to the man:

Becky is being replaced as manager by Sarah Chalke.