I agree 100%. I really didn't realize that there were actual guys that used the entitled tone. In my experience, the women were mad when I respectfully tried to move on after the awkward rejection. Here's a good story for you. So I had this friendgirl that lived on my floor in college. We were really good buddies, me,…

Go fuck yourself.

thanks for "getting it". I can't believe I started all this shit and I can't keep all the replies straight. I'm losing my fucking mind. And the worst part is that I started this based on experiences I had 10-20 years ago and are virtually moot now in practical terms to my life. I just read the article and the first…

So it's impossible to understand what it must feel like to be a married guy who's been cheated on? No one could possibly put themselves in that shoe? No one who has even been at least betrayed or cheated on in a non-marriage relationship could possibly comprehend what its like? That's silly. I think you've gotten hung…

And I've been providing the view from the other end. How else do any of us learn? Like I've dozens of times now, I'm sure this stuff does happen, but it's just as wrong for a sewing circle of women to blanketly assume these friendzone guys were just as much of an asshole as more blantantly assholic guys, as it is for…

This is kind of retarded. Again, I get that it must suck to be constantly concerned that men only want your body parts. Of course men and women can be friends platonically, I'm just saying that way more often than not, a random friendship will start with attraction at least on some level, right? And if he is spending…

you hopped on an early reply here, I eventually got enough feedback yesterday to better understand the point of view of this article. And I acknowledged several times that I do not understand, but can empathize with how society and men do often view women through the lense of their sexual availability. My whole point…

I do know the literal definition. I explained why I used it on another reply somewhere. But basically I used it to describe the feeling of caring for a friend (instead of a committed marriage) while hearing about or knowing about her sexual relationships with other men while she still wants you to be her…

I guess I've gotten hung up on the "ulterior motive" part; that's sound much duplicitous than I think generally happens. I mean if the shoes are reversed, I have never thought that a friendgirl that liked me or tried to take it to a sexual level was ever guilty of having ulterior motives. I would have just thought…

to better clarify cuckolding the way I used it I found a decent urban dictionary definition that somewhat explains "A sexually inadequate husband who accepts his wife can skank around and fornicate with other men. He quietly carries on with life whilst his wife flirts with Men online and meets them for hot sex. In…

Sorry I thought I covered my use of "cuckolding" more analogously to explain how it feels. Based on a lot of the feedback I've gotten, my experiences with the friendzone aren't what most of you meant. I initially took offense to the idea that a guy who was your friend, but felt rejected once finding out that you…

That makes much sense. Thanks for explaining.

very interesting. a bit of an overreaction from my POV but that's the nature of POV's right? Its funny, I remember when we (my college buddies) would use the friendzone term, it was more of a lament than an attack. Like "you can't get put in the friendzone or she'll never take you seriously" or "well, I just found out…

Great answer. If you really do get a guy saying "why did I listen to all your bitching for all that time if we were never going to fuck?" that's immature and probably the whole point of this article. Unrequited love is a silly cliché, but I think its totally reasonable and understandable if someone falls in love with…

I'm sure it happens a lot, and I've had this types of friendships and still do. But this whole article is about chatisizing a guy that does develop feelings and calling him immature or a misogynist just because he wants to be in a romantic relationship with someone that he is friends with; its a very specific…

I couldn't agree more. I don't think the relationships or perspective that you are talking about are the "friendzone" "girlfriendzone" situations. But in your example, there sounds like a cooling off period after your feelings were hurt and both of you found other partners, so the platonic relationship between you…

Ok, so this is really interesting and probably explains what Erin Gloria Ryan was trying to explain and probably why I've reacted so negatively to this conceit. The first thing I don't really get or agree with is that the guy made a "mistake" in the first place. And again, I just may be personalizing all of this way…

Hence read my next sentence, LOL. I'm glad you all have been enlightening me. But honestly, and this may prove your point again, but doesn't it seem like there's always going to be at least a hint of sexual tension in friendships like this. Again, I don't mean like professional, work-related type things or when one…

This is a great point and I have two thoughts on it. First, I've been ranting about a kind of specific scenario I guess, and I haven't been totally clear. I've been responding to the "ducky", "the guy other than Hugh Grant in Bridget Jones", rom-com type scenario. And I don't mean like a casual guy friend or someone…

You are right. I can't keep track of which replies I've made that acknowledge that I have/had no idea that there is a class of guy out there that really uses the friendship angle as a long con to have a one night stand or similar. It just seems much more logical and realistic that a guy friend would develop feelings…