I’m going to make this really simple for her. I work for the government in her neighboring state of West Virginia. When I was hired for this position, I had to sign a dozen or so pieces of paper that regulate my conduct while I’m acting as a state official. For instance: I can’t have a political bumper sticker on my…

You don’t want to issue marriage licenses without discriminatory practices and according to the actual law? Get another effing job. Vegetarians don’t work at Burger King. Bigots shouldn’t work at the Clerk’s Office.

If you look up ‘basic bitch’ in the urban dictionary, this is the picture. Her Uggs are probably on the floor.

I think that TMZ’s treament of Odom is less because of his race, and more because Harvey Levin has a deal with Odom’s former mother-in-law.

I saw this one, and I thought, “Bird does math like I do.”

Fewer, Hillary. it should be fewer.

Man, one of my friends from school just had a baby. Yay, huzzah, excellence. But omg the number of #blessed tags flying around is driving me up the fucking wall. Why does everyone has a baby suddenly turn into a writer of hallmark esque tweets? I mean, I am so happy for her, but it just seems so frikkin ott. Clearly…

I’ve thought Chris Pratt was a douchebag ever since that story about how he’d just get naked whenever on the Parks and Rec set and continued to do so even after people complained about it. I have no problem believing he’s cheating.

Hobbits are popular right now....

the thing about soggy potato chip is at least you can eat just one.

I believe that shame has resulted in revisionism—a sanitized version of history.

My mom had her records. My favorite song was “Sam”, but nobody else seems to have heard it.

To be fair that is one of the most non-story stories about the Kardashians available. I thought it was going to be another self righteous performance. I feel the guy.

Today, his producers informed him they are starting a new segment: “500 Days of Kristin.”

if only jezebel would follow his lead.

Right?! Like if my hypothetical wealthy boyfriend was dead set on spending $300k on my birthday, I’d definitely rather take an awesome trip or have him buy a vacation property for us to enjoy together. No way would I feel comfortable driving a car or wearing a ring worth that much, but alas, I am not a celebrity.

Awwww li’l baby Saracen is going to be so cuuuuuuute

These face pubes are not cute.

Many years ago at the group home for developmentally disabled teens where I worked there was a resident who really, really wanted to go to the best steak house in the city for his 18th birthday. He had behavior and anger issues, but was determined to earn that birthday dinner, and he managed it. So another staff…