Not a fat person, but I am a large person—huge bones, barrel-chested, muscular, I'm basically a big gay linebacker—and like your boyf am a FREAKISHLY WIDE SHOULDER person, and it is so, so, SO fucking irritating. On planes and on the subway, people just assume I'm being a dickbag and taking up extra space for my own…

The only problem with this list, and it is literally the only problem, is that the best Christmas song is the Eurythmics' "Walkin' In a Winter Wonderland." The other 9 here, though, I'm on board with.

You're amazing! Thank you!

*applauds* Pot Roast's what I make for Christmas every year, precisely this way, except how fucking dare you with canola oil cuz that shit will kill you use coconut oil, I use about a cup or so of beef stock and the rest wine (though I may forgo that this year per your suggestion cuz why bother?), and I put that shit…

Ok, not trying to be gross and we're all adults here: cum stains. Go.

Um, why is this so complicated, and why is apparently the only way to make home fries to make them for 16 people?

Hey Jezzies? Pretty fucking gross how many of you are suggesting this rape thing is bullshit that she's spouting for publicity. You're all supposed to know better, and should be ashamed of yourselves.

Thanks for your kind words. And I've never read Dawkins's book but I think of my mother literally every time it's mentioned! I should check it out I guess, but the thing is, I REALLY enjoy the air of superiority with which I say to myself, "Oh *I* don't need that book" every time I see it on a shelf ;)

Close. Reader's Digest version: I forced my mother to finally have a conversation about the fact that I'm gay, and challenged her to put her money where her mouth is, and in a move that surprised no one, she actually did and disowned me. (In the emotional sense, that is. There is no wealth or material to disown me…

At risk of sounding maudlin, a series of difficult events in the past 18 months have taken me on one of those "find out what you're made of" journeys, the unintended result of which was that I finally fucking figured out who I am (only took 35 yrs) and reached that point of having no more fucks to give about what…

At risk of sounding maudlin, a series of difficult events in the past 18 months have taken me on one of those "find out what you're made of" journeys, the unintended result of which was that I finally fucking figured out who I am (only took 35 yrs) and reached that point of having no more fucks to give about what…

Sick burn, bro. Or are you actually dumb enough you didn't catch the parody? Not that it matters. At any rate, good luck with that whole speaking-out-against-misogynistic-body-snark-by-engaging-in-misogynistic-body-snark thing. I'm sure it will serve you well.

I'm pretty got-damn gay, but anything even remotely androgynous on a woman totally turns me on. What I'm saying is I stand with you on the women in white tanks thing.

In my experience, shirts with a bit of Lycra to 'em do the trick the best. IDK about you, but MY problem is always that the shirt fits but the sleeves are baggy and, like, poof out or whatever in a weird triangle shape. (That might be because I have bizarrely wide shoulders though, IDK.) The Lycra-y tees usually cost…

You're not wrong, BUT as a formerly hefty guy, one tip that I am constantly giving dudes is that an upsized *athletic fit* t-shirt does A LOT toward giving the thicker bod the V-shaped societally dictated perfection and whatnot. Going up a size is key, though—it'll give shape to your body without clinging to your…

As a follower of Paleo eating and hence a non-eater of carbs, I'd like you to know that I come here to read intelligent, substantive commentary, not to be protein-shamed. If you don't want to not eat carbs then don't, but there's no need to write an entire blog comment snarking about a writer's presumptive carb…

Detroit? FUCKING. BULLSHIT. Summers in the D are no different than New York's. Utter nonsense. Don't be fooled! (But do go to Detroit for other cool shit! Just...not the weather.)

I've said it before and I'll say it again: there is a special place in hell for the sick asshole(s) who created this show.

Doesn't matter. Right or privilege, it needs to be offered to ALL citizens, not just some. Pretty simple, really.

Oh my god you FUCKING PEOPLE WHY IS CRYSTAL PEPSI LOSING I QUIT THIS SHIT.