That joke was so great because that was always about the worst thing I could do as a child growing up.

I know this is a standard "joke" but I had no idea there was a second Melrose Place.

AVClub is now The Onion.

MST3K riff:
Jeffrey Tambor IS Vincent Schiavelli AS Whoopi Goldberg!

I don't care for Jimmy Fallon but enough with the "stomach churning". He's a talk show host, he's not the fucking media. Far more people whose JOB it is to hold him accountable didn't.

Toad, the big trucker that eats at the diner. The killer? Cholesterol.

Inland Empire was just not good. I tried. I tried. Just…not good…

But how long will Sam Bee continue to repurpose heavily liked, blandly obvious Tweets into scrunchie-faced "jokes"?

Men, men, menmenmenmenmen, Mennnnn…

Also coming: No Limit Gwent Hold Em on ESPN2.

This is what happened to Conan!

He doesn't like her, and I don't kir.

Simultaneous Nermal jokes!!

And the way they shoehorned in Nermal as a second villain…

Episode 1: Pie.
Episode 2: Pie and coffee.
Episode 3: Bear claw.
Episode 4: Rabbit Stew (was always on the Double R chalkboard)
Episode 5: Baguette with Brie and Butter
Episode 6: Smoked Cheese Pig
Episode 7: Two cups of Black Coffee (Give Yourself a Present)
Episode 8: Donuts. Donuts. Donuts.
Episode 9: Fish Flavored Coffee
Ep…

AVC keeps going on about how nothing is being revealed about the new series. What is the consensus? I am of the mind that I do NOT want to know anything. When the show originally aired the previews for the next episode always gave you next to nothing. I like that. I want to go in fresh.

Do a lot of your favorite episodes have a green line through them like mine? I forget what would come up on the screen, but it was a VHS version of buffering. Surprised those tapes never snapped. That box set is one of my prized possessions.

That's funny, because I was 14 when TP was originally on, and now, I relate (disconcertingly) to Dennis Reynolds.

The Beloosh! as David Cross calls him.

Fuck off, GOB. (unedited)