So, like a Nissan Forester XT Nismo? That’s a fondue I could get into...

GT-Rs always fall into the “more or less” category.

Guys, you’re missing how exceptional this is! It’s like looking into the face of Patient (Z)ero. Somewhere around the time this thing finished production, it disseminated a code into the system which prevented Nissan from making anything else remarkable (more or less) in 15 years. If we can crack the code of how this…

Wait...so does it have one of those car fresheners in the shape of a Corolla for that “Fresh, New Car Scent”?

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Badge engineering. The practice alone riles up the blood and summons up the bile. It’s what happens when the math used to design a car is no longer concerned with physics, but accounting instead. With a limited number of parking spaces in the world, and only so many square miles of asphalt it feels like a failing as a…

The answer, as always is Roadmaster. Cheap, they tow, they’re huge to sleep in, they’re covered in more wood than Nick Offerman. What’s not to like?

Max Verstappen, Brazil 2016. The way he said, “Oh, you dummies are driving over thurr? I’mma be over hurr” and just invented traction among the ducks on the outside of the turns. Yes, there will be copious amounts of examples from years gone by when the cars demanded more control, and had less systems in place to help…

Take a moment, just one to gawk at that muffler pipe snaking it’s way out the back. Now, I don’t know if Alfa intended it to look like their badge-serpent, but that’s one of the swankiest looking carbon trumpets I’ve ever laid eyes on.

The Evolution of Rallying: The Middle Earth Years

I knew it! I knew the LFA was a time machine. Here we can see evidence of it having gone to the past, made sweet automotive love to a Nissan 300 SX and then took off in a fantastically Yakkity Sax-themed get away. Once born, the child was told its father was American (a filthy lie to protect the fragile ego of this…

I think I just solved the “Why is the Eclipse a crossover now” conundrum! FCA and Mitsubishi are stuck in an endless chicken/egg scenario where neither of them are sure which of their sad selves actually created it first! I can see it now, FCA gets purchased by the Chinese. Mitsubishi begs the Chinese to buy them.…

Might as well be called the “Dodge Eunuch” because whenever I see them they’re driven by “manly men” with sword tattoos with dragons. They have their manly Oakley glasses perched atop their nose like a mask of valour. However, in the back seat are two kids and a child seat. The man said “Nay, wife. I will not have a…

Before someone says it, yes I know the van is automatic. That’s a fixable problem.

Neutral: I’m a millennial. My wife and I are car enthusiasts who abhor SUVs and crossovers. We’re planning on spawning a child. That child will also abhor SUVs and crossovers. We drive manuals exclusively, because automatics make you a lazier driver and we’re not down with that. That fact alone eliminates most of the…

I for one welcome a Wrangler sold under the red flag. I’ve been buying Chinese-built motorcycles for years now, and repair and replacement parts are pretty much interchangeable with anything sporting two wheels. In an effort to streamline, Great Wall would likely have more components coming in from other…

I applaud the appearance of the Abarth. It’s like saying, “Yeah, I’m rich. I also enjoy mustard on my pancakes fed to me by Dali in a gimp mask”. It’s eccentric in that way only the wealthy seem to get away with.

Perfect car for enjoying the eclipse. Take one long look at that beautiful moon-covered Sun and roast your eyes out, forgetting instantly the horror of that interior colour scheme. It looks like the inside of the U-Haul van I rented when I learned what lemons do to my dog’s lower GI.

Perfect car for

“But Mr. Ikeda, I think we need to review the front ligh—”