4th Gear: The big money guys who claim to be experts are upset that building cars doesn’t translate into wildly fluctuating valuations the way tech stocks do. So now we can add Capitalism to the list of things Facebook ruined for everyone.

I wasn’t old enough to drive when the Avalanche debuted, and even then I knew it was machismo idiocy on wheels. I figured, if a six thousand pound truck that can’t actually fit anything in its bed counts as a commuter car to people, then it was only a matter of time before people were driving semi-tractors for fun.

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the Kinjaverse, people are up in arms over J.K. Rowling using Native American legends for dumb referential tie-ins.

It looks like a cross between an electric shaver and a bowling shoe.

This is everything that a hybrid-electric car should be:

Nissan Versa. The manual option is the cheapest new car in America, so you have a nice warranty for inevitable “trouble”.

Neutral: Not gonna lie, the Chevy Sonic is a nifty little machine.

Convergent evolution in action.

If anything, this trailer gives us more insight into the tension between Evans and LeBlanc. Have you ever had to practice high-fiving with someone? That’ll make you hate each other real fast.

The critical question is this: Are these curators the people responsible for every website being littered with articles titled “This one weird trick...” or “You’ll never believe what happened next”? Because if so, every single one of them goes in the fire.

Seeing that much luxury packed into such an intentionally crappy car always brings a smile to my face. Next they should do this with a Mini or a 2CV, or being German specialists, a Goggomobil.

Is anybody surprised by this? The Panamera is a car made by and for people who want a car with everything but perspective.

Time to bone up on constitutional law, I gotta get in on this deal.

Boneheaded gas/emissions cheating practices have not only revealed how far actual industry performance is from nominal targets, but the whole industry is going to lose a third of its combined stock value by the time they’re all found out.

#COTD

“...paving the way toward innovative, disruptive vehicles for the 21st Century and beyond...”

Call me crazy, but if you had to choose between crashing into a concrete divider and crashing into another car traveling the same direction you are, wouldn’t hitting the other car actually be safer for everyone involved? Cars have crumple zones and aren’t rooted to the spot. Hitting the barrier could spit you back…

Maybe that’s exactly what they’re counting on? Chrysler has stayed in business for forty years by running a handful of platforms into the ground, abrogating their debts and contracts with brackruptcy law, then riding reinvestment and bailout money thru the next market cycle until they crap out again. From FCA’s…

That’s a big part of why Ford is still as strong as they are, they gave up on being the world’s largest automaker and just stuck to doing what they already know works.

How the hell did that Camry even get up there? Is a ramp somewhere outside of the photo?