Well, obviously the population of "Beauty and the Beast" is far larger than anyone knew.

Wake me when it looks like an SUV, a full-size pickup truck, or a 35-foot RV.

I'll bet a large percentage of women would marry an unemployed man if he was between 5'8" and 6'2" and had less than 5% body fat and looked like a douchebag.

IMHO, this should be the plot basis of a third X-Files movie.

Or Reardon Metal.

There are two things that annoy me about smart phones: 1) No true caller ID and no one-touch way to Google the phone number and 2) How is it that there are hundreds of sites that claim to know who the number belongs to but will only tell you for a fee? You'd think with all of Google and Apple's resources, they could…

So naturally he creates Current TV. But I digress. I'm sure he means Fox News and only Fox News.

I propose a lengthy and extensive study on boobs. I'll need a few million dollars in grant funding. It'll surely qualify as a shovel-ready project.

How about Vu Ja De? That feeling that somehow none of this has ever happened before...and then it's gone.

Note that the guy with the video camera isn't filming the whales.

Only if you're the hot blonde at the top. Everyone else looks like a total nerd-geek.

My education because nobody can take it away from me.

Medical hack of the day: If they have trouble finding your veins for a blood draw, have them put a BP cuff on your arm and tell them to pump it up halfway between systolic and diastolic pressure. What this does is allow blood to flow into your arm but not out (more or less) so your veins will stand out better.

Well, ya know, the nanny-state/healthfood-wonks/nutrition-nazis have made all other food into total sh*t so it was bound to happen sooner or later.

I read that too fast and grokked "Micheal Gambon vs. Hitler" and thought "Dumbledore takes on Hilter? WTF."

"Wants to be Star Wars"?!?!? You can only be Star Wars if you A) do really cool stuff nobody has ever seen before and B) people have no expectations going into the movie.

I've known for decades that Mattel is a scary company.

This reminds me of cruising down a desert road doing about 90 when I see a raven chowing down on something sizable in the middle of the road. The bird took off with his lunch as I approached. Now think about this: middle of the friggin' desert. Which way would the bird choose to fly? Off to the side? Nah...Same…

Do you have to put a banana peel and a beer into it to power it?

Quoth the owl, "Pottermore...Pottermore...Pottermore...eat my shorts."