His first draft: “We are fucked. Fucker fucked us. After Westbrook fucks us we are more fucked. No good player will fucking replace them because who the fuck wants to live in fucking Oklafuckinghoma?”

I hope they go undefeated and score 1,000 points per game. I hope they melt the arenas in which they play because they make the ball move so beautifully, and so quickly, that the air becomes super-heated with the vigorous masturbation of the assembled angelic hosts of heaven. I hope Kevin Durant, Steph Curry, Klay…