I assume that compass only works when he’s facing south, right?

Next up he’ll be learning about the chambers of Congress. 

It’s actually possible that a Boston bro might buy up a whole bunch of extra bee-ahs beforah ovahtime since they fakin stohped sellin’ dem. 

Eller did a lot of things right, according to early news reports.

Warriors fans have always been pretty much the only California sports fans I have respected because they were always there and always loud, even though the Warriors always sucked. I’ve truly enjoyed this run of success because it wasn’t the Lakers or Celtics -- it was a team that was always a doormat but had rabid…

Just bring back the goddamn sneaker phone. Only let me wear it this time.

I mean... not just apparel:

The excuses are just so lame. I’ve been there. It’s not that big a deal to get to the ballpark and the Trop, while not one of these $800M “jewels,” is not as bad as its made out to be.

Completely transparent doesn’t really work with a roof like that because it turns it into a greenhouse and creates weird glare. The roof they have actually is translucent and lets in sunlight during day games. 

Pedroia was in one of my favorite commercials featuring an athlete because of the willingness (rare among baseball players) to have fun poked at him:

Those concerns grew exponentially when Eller’s car was found with her water bottle, wallet and phone still inside. The location of those belongings led some to believe that this was much worse than a case of a lost hiker. In reality they were only left behind because Eller thought she’d be done with her hike fast…

Now we’ll refer to you as a collision. 

Not much risk on low-interest, fixed money. 

And Leonard had five points in the second half and didn’t make another three. Regression to the mean is a funny thing. 

Johnson’s scorched-earth interview, like everything else he has ever done with the noble exception of wrestling HIV to a standstill, is an utter calculation

Seriously. Hey, we don’t usually do racist things so don’t hold this racist incident against us. 

You keep your spouse up in Canada and go for visits? I’m intrigued. 

I shared this video with all my boating friends over the weekend. People never fail to impress with their stupidity. My favorite part, though, might be the life jacket he appears to be wearing.

Yes, if only the referees gifted you another power play to convert on. 

A .220 hitter who strikes out a ton and occasionally mashes a monster tater? Congrats to Philly on signing Steve Balboni.