Because I am a Wisconsin apologist, I was tempted to go with all WI beers, but alas I didn't:

Don't worry! The new lane closures have made the freeway completely useless to those of us on the southwest side! Your traffic has been reduced!

Another added benefit of keeping DST is not having delays on E/W running freeways because of sunshine. Yes, there are such things as FUCKING SUNSHINE DELAYS on the Milwaukee interstate. The best was about a month ago the morning sun (driving east) was right in the eyes of the average driver at around 6:45 am and…

The 49ers should rename themselves the 06ers because they are burning themselves to the ground.

I hate to say it but I don't really disagree with any of these. Croquet is the perfect inflection point - you're never going to break a sweat playing a normal game of croquet, but it does take skill, has a clear winner, etc.