Reached for comment, Buffalomeat said he finally feels like he’s getting back at his old Little League coach, who left him to rot in the outfield.

Well that’s different. Usually the biggest boob you see at a Marlins game is Jeffrey Loria.

I know most of her ideas about how to properly educate American children are really dumb, but jesus christ, how fucking stupid does she have to be to think that this was going to go well for her?

This makes me all warm and tingly.

They look like Starburys.

If someone would just invent tear-away dress slacks, these would be perfect for playing after a business meeting without having to change shoes.

I’ve been thinking about this and his best solution would be to wear some nikes with the logo covered in duct tape, then just apply the BBB logo on with a marker.

Because the more money people pay for them, the more money we make. Learn some economics, Dan!

-Lavar Ball

LaVar Ball is a light-skinned Joe Jackson. You just know that Lonzo’s ass looks like Denzel Washington’s back in Glory.

They look like Hugh Hefner died and was reincarnated as a shoe.

I agree. Selling much less product and making much less money is markedly easier than selling a lot and making a lot.

I think these would be a good investment. The company will blow up — he’ll likely end up with a plain-vanilla sponsorship deal in a year or two — and these will sell as status items for $3,000 on eBay.

Big Baller?

Looks more like the vintage Big Bowler by Ernie McCracken.

Crackpipe.

Looks like the Bengals logo to me

He’s not that dumb (maybe). Making 100,000 pairs of shoes and selling them for $100 a piece takes some real work and industry connections. It’s a lot easier to only have to make like 20 pairs and sell them for 500 bucks each.

Those Ewing shoes...eeeesh. Should’ve called them Yikes.

Good call by Lonzo to play in these. Fortunately for him, no basketball players have ever had troubles with their ankles or knees, so there’s no risk in wearing knockoff shoes.

Jesus, and I thought that BBB3 MS Paint logo thing was bad... These shoes are generic Payless butt.

On the plus side, 5% of all Big Baller merch sales go to elephantiasis research.