If she’s DTF, then she’s cute enough for a fella his age.

Yeah, Christopher Eccleston would have been my perfect Snape, right down to the age, the nose, and the ability to be scary as fuck without doing anything too threatening. As you say, what could have been...

“Don’t antagonize him, or he’ll just hit you harder.”

Perogies.

Breathing slowly (6 breaths per minute) works.

If you’ve taken it before and been fine, then it’s probably not something you need to worry about.

I loved it, but I was 9.

He’s too much of a narcissist to ever admit to being sick. Remember when he was rushed off to hospital and we still don’t know why? He can’t bear to appear weak.

It’s the little “S’up” chin lift that draws you in and the surprise-and-surprisingly-earnest lip-synching that captures your heart.

They have rapid tests all the time in the White House, so I suspect they were waiting on the results of a slower, more accurate test, before admitting to anything.

I guess the lesson here is, don’t mess with RBG’s dying wish.

I’m a bit worried about how many October Surprises there are gonna BE, if that was just day 1.

THERE HAVE BEEN SO MANY. FLYING-SPAGHETTI-MONSTER-ON-A-CRACKER, IT’S ONLY OCTOBER 1ST.

I have a feeling she’s too peevishly lazy to have done anything criminal herself. You can tell (especially in this tape) that she’s seething with resentment over being made First Lady. She signed up to be a trophy wife, dammit, and now she’s expected to do actual work.

The rigid three-quarters portrait pose is weird, right? It’s not hard to make this woman look gorgeous, so why did they nail her to the stool and hide a neck brace under her turtleneck? She’s stiffer than a Norwegian Blue.

I suspect it’s because it’s exhausting to have everyone in your vicinity trying to chat you up and befriend you constantly, and if you’re a star working amid people desperate for a way to climb up that ladder you’re standing on, you get a lot of that.

Hey Don Jr, your girlfriend shows other people your dong.

I’m pretty sure that mark on his neck is just where the makeup stopped because his collar had been buttoned up when they put it on him...

It’s a rehash of calling Papadopoulous a coffee boy. If they make him look bad, he pretends he’s never heard of them.

Hawkins Cheezies are the best, but they fail miserably on the various “puff” criteria, because while they are also cheese-dusted corn extrusions, they are HARD and CRUNCHY and also super-cheesy-salty-yum and they will not dissolve for you, you wimp.