Why not the Lijang Tower of D.Va?

Very obviously his caribouty.

WITNESS THE FIREPOWER OF THIS FULLY ARMED AND OPERATIONAL BATTLESTATION

...as if 2.35 million metro region voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

#mophie is love, #mophie is life

8-year-old me was dead sure that the gift bear’s eyes being crossed was a big source of anger for her.

Dude, I still hear “cross-eyed bear that you ga’e to me” every time.

I love it. I qualified for the state Mathcounts competition by being one of the top finishers in my region many moons ago. Eighth grade or so. Since I was top ten, I had to compete one-on-one in a sort of ladder match (10 vs. 9, winner plays 8, winner plays 7, etc.) at the front of the auditorium. Best of three. I was…

Unless you’re at an all-inclusive in the Caribbean, where the first thing they do is put a wristband on you that you have to leave on FOR THE WHOLE FREAKING WEEK ARRRGGHH!

Importantly, one must remember that there is no such thing as a Golden Showa Day.

If I buy my gal a ring for $21k (AAAAACK), she'd better be able to summon Captain Planet with that thing.

Apple Maps

How angry is Kanye right now?

I beat all my rape charges. #belikemamba