Why not just eat the fruits and vegetables?

Spate, not spat.

“Past times”? I mean, American history is fine and all, but not what you mean.

THIS. Appeals to hypothetical green or purple people need to get named, like Godwin’s Law, so we have a shorthand for the idiots who do that. Maybe we can call it Frankel’s Law.

JOLIE IS BACK?????? SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Ah, the schadenfreude. I can’t stand this smarmy bastard. He’s Jim Nantz’s ultimate wet dream. He calls everybody sir! He defers to the elders of the game! He’s so polite!

You know, societal norms aren’t necessarily bad.

Here’s hoping Season of Cardinals Losses is the successor to 500 Days of Weird Anti-Vaxxer.

Probably shouldn’t engage because you’re likely trolling with this idiocy, but here goes:

Ranking of ridiculous quasi-occupations:

How have you survived this long writing on the internet?

Because it’s not relevant to her being raped. Dumbass.

I’m inspired by Ursula Le Guin. Just noting it.

Stories to cover: tennis players shrieking. Serena Williams: on drugs? UConn women’s basketball — unwatchable? Lady football fans — so cute!

Will everything be pink? I’ve heard chicks dig pink.

Mortified to see the political lingo of “suspend” metastisizing into broader usage. Yuck.

I was fully prepared to go into GOML mode, but....yeah, this is dreadful, idiotic piece.

YES THIS

Wealthy industrialist A.G. Pennypacker approves of this plan.

Two political locutions that need to go away immediately: “suspending” a campaign, and “misspoke.”