I mean, the NFL doesn’t think they can. Remember a few years ago when a kicker/punter actually tackled a guy and hte NFL hit him with a “random” PED test?

So are we just conceding that tackling is not a skill we require in kickers?

These Russian bots are everywhere now

Rolled my eyes so hard I saw my own brain.

It’s like the one calling others snowflakes, are the snowflakes.

“Like bedbugs on your wedding day”

Red and yellow feel like pretty obvious choices.

What’s the hood and tassel color for a communist indoctrinator?

“Did I see careers?  I meant career.  My career.  Fuck the rest of you.”

If you believe your career could be threatened because somebody else called you a bedbug, you are in the wrong career. Now if you’re willing to sacrifice your career because someone called you a bedbug, that’s on you.

I would frame that email and put it up in my office just like I framed the printout from the College Republicans website at a previous university that declared me a “communist indoctrinator.”

So to recap, Mr. “Our Society is Collapsing Because Free Speech on College Campuses is Being Threatened by Snowflakes!” is trying to get a media professor fired for a bit of criticism delivered as a harmless, pithy joke. 

He-Man radiates so much testosterone and manliness that clothes simply vaporize from his body. Transforming into Adam is the only way he can wear pants.

The intensity of the light coming from the strike could very well have been enough to fuck up the sensor in the camera for that fraction of a second. That sensor has to take in color, light, and scenery detail all in one go, but much like your actual eyes, it can’t do all those things at once all the time when a…

I always refer to him as Handjob Bob but "Two Tugs" is pretty great too.

I know I should stick to sports but I enjoy talking about handjobbers.

Dearest Peyton,
I have heard since your departure from our legion years ago that you won several battles and a decorated retirement, and have been spending the time since soapboxing wares and entertaining. How doest thou? Any tips for a fellow soldier who also limps away, albeit with less medals?

— Andrew

Dearest Mother,