How many minutes do you think it’ll take him to get kicked out of the next bar? I figure four.

“What do you mean you clogged the toilet with a boa?”
“It means exactly what I said fat ass.”

He was clean-shaven before the game started.

Ok, so he can be racist, but I can’t? Hey society, here’s your mirror.

Easy to say with a one-and-done son on the way out the door.

show a little respect for the office of president, Col-Stinkmeaner...

Well, they did have the meets.

Furiously downloading the SeekingArrangement app.

That’s a tricky question.

In broad political strokes I would say that roughly half the armed forces voted against Trump and roughly half voted against Clinton. (Nobody voted FOR anyone in this election.) The breakdown was largely generational; older vets and officers that had been around felt more uncomfortable with…

I spent 2 years as a neuro ICU RN, and it’s impossible to say without any disclosure of symptoms. Neuro ICU patients are typically stroke, seizure, or head injury cases.

Not really surprised the general public hasn’t equated police settlements with tax dollars and started holding these departments accountable for their behavior. Unless someone in the government literally pickpockets a 20 from them and hands it directly to a brutalized minority I really don’t see anyone giving a shit.…

BAH BAH, JEEM

I spent my entire weekend calling in rules violations to the LPGA, so it was nice being able to take this game off. Good job refs.

Weird. It’s almost like Gronkowski had advance knowledge that Tom Brady would be holding his jersey like that, like he knew what the quarterback would do there.

Let me guess…this was Wrestlemania LXIX

Alternates:

I totally read that, and most certainly imagined that as porn squad.

Maybe the cheerleaders did something completely disgusting and amoral, like going to a restaurant with a married man.