"Marsha and I always planned to have five children..."

And yet, still so many tits.

I'll be honest and admit to posting a slam on Christie and the Cowboys yesterday on twitter, but I avoided the weight thing, since that would be below the belt.

Hopefully the coach will be a little more specific in the future when he calls for the runs.

Yeah, but I hear you can get it topped with Eminems.

Why didn't they remove their logo from the truck before they let it go?

I just came twice!

Is it just me or do boxing trainers always sound like the sleaziest people on the planet?

Considering how punchable that face is, he got off lucky.

Belichick: Can anyone get that dick Gray for me!?

just one hit man.

I….I don't think I can live without a molten corgi.

Stop making me want to re-sub!

I did once see a workhorse evolved into a jackass.

I like none of the people in your story.