The Patriots also lost to the Jets, and also no one fucking cares about the Patriots on an article about the Cardinals.

19 different Cardinals have scored in 2015

okay thanks for stopping by

The Triple A’s are also an alias used by the Miami Marlins.

this joke would have been funnier if it had been told 10 years ago

“I’m trying to win the game so I don’t get fired” is all we really needed.

Everyone in Wisconsin knows the real “bold new beginning” is when you switch to High Life Light after your third heart attack.

“I think that guy is the towel manager or something”

Papelbon’s right, you know. Doesn’t seem very fair that he should get in trouble when there’s 25 guys in that dugout who choked.

One can understand your dad being embarassed his son stooped to drinking Miller Lite...

I, for one, look forward to six hour long football games with 4 1/2 hours worth of commercials.

Guess you had to be there

Somewhere, a Florida land developer fondly recalls the time he tortured Mark Brunell’s bank accounts to death.

This is the same man who cried about Tom Brady probably knowing that some footballs got fucked with.

As a Panthers fan living in NC, I've seen and heard a lot of them. There is a very vocal minority of Panther fans that hate him. Also a lot of Redskin/Cowboy/Packer "fans" hate him.

This guy is certainly in the running.

He’s like Bo Derek, a perfect 9-1.

This is probably my favorite part of the media-hype train derailing—when the same media acts like it’s some great mystery that needs unraveling and only they can do it.

I believe what he actually said was “Everyone hath a plan until they get punthed in the mouth.”

Why was the hell was this fight “more than a little heartbreaking to watch?”