Are you female? Why I ask: Females are often called aggressive when they are actually being assertive. I have been told I’m aggressive when I’m just being direct. The thing is, I’m not changing my tone, eye contact, intelligence, nor my direct language. The people who have had a problem with it need to change...maybe…

Oh my god. This. I am not a millenial. I’ve been in a technology related job for more than 20 years. This phrase is one of many women use or are encouraged to use in order to come across a collaborative and agreeable versus assertive, aggresive and/or bitchy. I try not to use it as much as possible but I know I do…

Question, with no judgment implied, just curious: Are you male or female? Because the male-female dynamic in the workplace is an endless source of both fascination and frustration. And having worked for a woman who was an utter tyrant, I have a bit of a chip on my shoulder about how female bosses deal with female…

I feel like fundamentalist theocrats might be heartless and full of shit.
vs.
History PROVES that fundamentalist theocrats are heartless and full of shit.

(Yup. Professor has a point.)

That’s terrible advice. My female manager and I are both trying to actively stop saying such things and qualifying ourselves. Such gendered nonsense.

You should tell her that as directly as possible! I'm sure it will go well...

It’s amazing how commonly women hear similar things in a professional context — and how rarely men do. Men being assertive is an asset; women being assertive is a character flaw. And then we’re told that it’s our fault that we make less and get passed over for promotions because we’re just not assertive enough.

I used to manage someone who was very direct. Others, who happened to be older than her, used to complain about her “tone.” Especially in email. Direct, to the point. Any tone was added by the reader. I coached her some, but I’ll be damned if I was ever going to betray another woman and tell her to hedge what she…

Ooooh that is some bullshit right there. I have an “issue” of coming off too direct, apparently. My reaction is ok so you want me to be passive aggressive. Got it.

I get that feedback a LOT at work from superiors. My IDGAF has hit the level where this comment elicits the blinkstare. We all know I’m not going to change, regardless of how butthurt the boys get.

Yes! I find leading with “I feel...” is a woman thing in the workplace (and life in general too). I know I guilty of leading with it vs. just saying something outright.

I find myself doing that all the time. “I think...” or “I feel...” or “I’m not sure but...” Basically qualifying my knowledge. Also trying to explain why or how I know something (I learned that in school, read it somewhere, etc.) instead of just stating what I know. I hate it and try to catch myself when I do it. I…

head*desk

This comment is so late I’m sure I will be permanently gray and nobody will ever read it, but I’m just going to put this out there anyway. I happen to live in Pinellas County, probably less than 15 minutes drive from the pond these girls died in.

Want to bring up to everyone that this is in Florida, in a murky pond, at night, right after a big water-disturbing commotion.

All choices have consequences.

^^THIS.

So suddenly they “care” about people of color?? Lol ‘kay.

My husband has no problem buying my tampons. After going through the hell that was my uterine fibroid with me, he doesn’t bat an eye.

There is if you manage your company's social media. Like I do.