For the mafia story, my dad saved the life of a don’s son because the other soldiers wanted to kill his annoying ass. They told my dad flat out they were going to kill the guy in the middle of combat. Dad got him moved to another post. When dad came home, the don came and picked him up from the airport. He took dad to…

Of course.

Do these jeans look good?

Is this real? Because it’s dirty and awesome.

Taiwanese flag at 1:41, the feels man, so glad they finished and finished well in the oldest cars in the entire field!!!

Still their mascot? So I take it they adopted her! That is AWESOME.

Okay, here she is. Her name is Bossy. Once upon a time, she was a starving little stray who stole garbage. Now, she’s an arm-hugging, extremely-affectionate little mischief machine.

My cat, who once opened a microwave oven while the popcorn was popping, has more self-control than the caramel lady.

My cat, who once destroyed a floor-to-ceiling lamp with her butt, has more self-control than the caramel lady.

My cat, who once fell off a bookshelf at 3 AM only to land butt-first on my face (catass…

i plead the 5th.

I have pictured this scene, particularly “I’m a bit of a perfectionist” before every interview I have ever had.

actually we use them for...

Nothing wrong with that. Mr R and I are sans spawn so we cling to the idea that we’re still young and carefree. It falls apart a little though when there are mirrors involved.

Yeah *sigh*. But I am wiser. You?

Ewan MacGregor, Christopher Ecclestone and Kerry Fox. Such brilliant casting. They were so young.

I’m not sure but this might be the baby from Shallow Grave? But yes, very fake, very creepy. I do it this way

Flashback.

I’m not sure if that beer is offensive. But this is

(NOT HEROIN)