That's just one of a whole litany of bizarre messages this trailer espouses. It's like the "chick flick" for women who hate women (and to some extent, themselves). Everything about this movie looks way off base.

The beginning of this trailer actually makes it seem like the blonde is looking around the room for whomever is doing the voice over. Is he behind that door? Or that one?

Almost makes this look good enough for a direct to Redbox release.

In what world is this movie supposed to exist? Rebel Wilson is the fount of relationship advice in NYC and coasts on her sexual appeal? Uh, maybe in Nowheresville, OK at closing hour. But NYC? And Leslie Mann is ostensibly a contemporary of the other three female leads? Perhaps several years ago. Did Judd Apatow…

I think you're onto something with this Unified Theory. I can picture the flow chart already.

Hanks and Fatroyd are the best rap duo ever. Or almost as good as the time Dolemite did that track with Big Daddy Kane.

It's okay Matthew. I hate myself enough to still eat at Taco Bell (sober).

And they'd taste just as good.

And your stomach would thank you. At least you wouldn't be doing the Carl Lewis to the nearest restroom.

That sounds about right. BK is like the roulette of fast food.

Paxton.

Where I live, there are three Burger Kings within a four mile radius and they're all equally terrible. At any given time there never seems to be more than two people working there and the service (as you mentioned) leaves something to be desired. Which is really too bad because it used to be my favorite fast food,…

You're right about that my friend. It'd take a special kind of talent to make another 1941.

Definitely. The last thing I saw him in was Flight of the Intruder which came out in…1991. My main takeaway from that film at the time was, damn, Rosanna Arquette looks pretty freakin' hot. Which in retrospect is somewhat sad considering that the movie was directed by John Milius. Yes, John Milius.

The "working man's renaissance man." Wow, just wow. If ever there was a guy born to play a glorified background extra, it was Brad Johnson.

No kidding. And co-starring Mr. Charisma himself, Brad Johnson.

Spielberg needs at least one bomb a decade to keep the world in balance. I saw this in the theater on opening weekend. Why? I'll never know.

Malek is a great actor, but I don't think that Mr. Robot has nearly the amount of viewers as House of Cards. Make of that what you will. He's definitely been on my radar since The Pacific, where he was clearly the standout in the cast.

I agree that doing painful and stressful things does not equate to good acting, but DiCaprio is solid for an A-list actor. There's really no one else in his age group consistently doing good work in movies that are usually interesting at the very least. He could've easily coasted on a wealth of pretty boy roles and…

Conway would be the ideal guest for Gilbert Gottfried's podcast where all they do is sit around and geek out on old showbiz stories.