And surely these are not the tools of his trade. There's only one tool; The Hammer. (The Hammer is his penis).

Ah, science.

God help us we're in the hands of engineers.

Actually the engineers for Schlitterbahn are a bunch of hill country Texans with German roots.

Complaining about food you let get cold or slow service if you're taking forever is silly. But...

I once took a brewery tour at Anchor Brewing in San Francisco. I made a wise crack about Budweiser during the tour, and the brewmaster retorted that "people give Bud a hard time, but for what it is, they brew it with incredible consistency". He admired them for how precisely they control the brewing process despite…

Eh, I don't think it's less valid than any other attempt to define a "generation," which is an arbitrary distinction to begin with. You can try to assign some objective definition, i.e., people who fought in WWII (Greatest Generation) children born in the immediate post-war years (Baby Boomers), but even then, the…