I’m just waiting to find out that Carson is really just a white guy in black face that was dreamed up by the Republican party.

+1 if only for that last sentence

Nicole was subsequently dumped because Lacob finally found the trophy-wife he had been looking for.

Man, I’ve seen some stuff. But a woman fitting that inside her? Now that’s a stretch.

The National Suicide Prevention Hotline can be reached at 1 (800) 273-8255.

Nancy probably gave him polite handjobs while he leafed through a copy of LIFE magazine.

Baylor could use a quarterback...

Get some video of that. Because in 8 years she will turn onto a teenage monster and you will appreciate some blackmail material to keep her in line. “No, you do NOT talk to your mother that way. Do it one more time and maybe your friends on the cheer squad see this.”

Oh, you’re one of THOSE people.

Math is delicious.

Can’t you just give your kid Flamin’ Hot Limon Cheetos and let nature take its course?

Forget the oval office. How many people have jerked it/had sex in an AirBnB rental? I’d say 98% of all rentals.

I’ve got a confession to make. I read the articles.

But then Dan loses. Dwarf can’t handle that.

...how will the government explain registrations like MARIJUANA FOR SALE, CAPITALISM SUCKS DONKEY BALLS, or KIRK COUSINS STARTING NFL QUARTERBACK?

They’re not wrong, they’re just assholes.

How did Washington’s lawyers gain access to my browser history?

+1 very tall soap box.

Looks chili in there