Same. But maybe like, normal piccata with a side of alfredo for dipping? Because I love salt and lemons AND garlic butter cream goddamn it.

It’s dumb af, but every time I let my dogs out in the back yard, I mock-yell “And stay out!”

I am so sorry that you had this happen to you. You did the right thing to stand up to a horrible person and you didn’t deserve any of her bullshit. Keep fighting the good fight.

Ramekin. Always liked this word. You’ve got the “ram” which is nice, and then “ekin” to top it off. Ramekin.

AND then she ordered vegetables!

I work in healthcare and get to particpate in some pretty cool life-saving emergent situations. Picture a liter of soda because that’s how I am going to reference quantity.

Guys, I was a witness to not one, but two, awful fucking customers this weekend. I was at The Grove in LA, which, as a native, is usually a giant fucking no-no because it’s 90% tourists and 10% rich assholes from the Los Angeles area, but I needed to go to Barnes and Noble and it was the closest one to my apartment.…

I have farted in a restaurant. I have never farted *at* someone in a restaurant. There is a difference.

I decided that it was in the best interest of my mental and physical health to work as a banquet server/ bartender.

Hell, I just want video of those shamed pamphlet hangers.

I couldn’t fathom that. I cannot FATHOM demanding that a manager go buy me food. Like, even if I was about to collapse into a diabetic coma, I couldn’t imagine doing that.

“Here, lady, here’s your bag of dicks. Enjoy eating it.”

One day, this regular came in and was seated in my manager’s section (since it was slow the manager was also taking tables). My manager immediately let me take the table...

Well you see, vegetables can be crunchy, or red, therefore by extension, she was allergic to all of them.

The fact that the guy was promptly arrested, handcuffed, is a redeeming feature of that story.

I would have loved to take those calls from the complex shortly thereafter...

allergic to all vegetables? i have a legitimate medical reason for not eating most vegetables (gastroparesis) and that’s not an appropriate reason to claim an allergy (of which i also have several). typically i just ask them not to bring the vegetables with it. if the sever offers a substition, awesome. if not, that’s…

I have stories of my pizza delivery days that I should probably submit to BCO. I managed to talk my boss into letting me be a driver because the money was good, even though generally unofficial his policy was only to hire drivers over 18. I was a 16 year old girl and we were in a fairly decent neighborhood so bent his…

One day, this regular came in and was seated in my manager’s section (since it was slow the manager was also taking tables).

Being the parent of a temperamental 3-year old who thinks he is too old for high chairs yet can’t sit still in a normal chair, I was sympathetic to the Cheesecake Factory parents...until the end. You can’t always predict if your kids are going to act like they’ve lost their goddamn minds before you go into a…