But most importantly, is it grounded to the ground?

On the one hand I say it likely drives just as well as 85% of the public that can’t be arsed to look up from their cellphones while they meander about town.

I don’t see any of these “near t-bones” as an issue, personally.

It’s possible that FCA doesn’t know how to bargain with a union they haven’t bribed. There might be a learning-curve going-on here. 

Who the fuck trades in a low mileage EVO for a NEW MITSUBISHI? 

If you are near a computer and you know it’s a robo call you can play the following “phone disconnected” sound and they will think the number is no longer active and remove you from the list. I have known about this for sometime and have yet to be in a position to do it, I’m always out an about.

I am liking the Agent Johnson approach recommended above—”FBI Cybercrimes and Fraud Division, this is Agent Johnson. To whom am I speaking?”

Universal rule to increase happiness:  Delete Facebook.

Now, this is the point where you make some comments about “warranties” and “reliability.” I got news for you, friend-o—you aren’t keeping this car forever. You’ll pick up one of these coupes and hang on to it for two or three years max, then life will dictate something more practical.

Because there are worse things out there than Microsoft Office. Anyone forced to use IBM Notes knows what I’m talking about.

Im shocked. This has never happened before.

This is a great stopgap until self-driving cars become available. Then you’ll be able to just put your infant in there let’er go for a joyride.

Hey, in fairness, nobody ever knew how complicated this stuff was.

No, this is obviously a ‘meanwhile, in Australia’ joke.

Yes, or the STI. These are really the only two acceptable answers. Hey Jalopnik, wanna see how fucking OLD you’ve gotten? Just re-read what you wrote to this poor confused college student.

By grannys, someone get Mr. Bachelor a tallyho! He was stabbed by a doctor with eight cent calico!

I often ask people when they boast about their Regan era shit-can being reliable and over 250k miles “how many engine and transmission overhauls/rebuilds/replacements have you done?”
They start boasting about how they replaced the engine twice and the transmission has been replaced and recently rebuilt. Then i ask…

I would argue that your “solution” is more worthy of quotes than this one, as it’s proven itself invalid. It’s like the “solution” to systemic obesity being people don’t eat as much, or the “solution” to the opiates problem for people not to do drugs, or the “solution” to teenage pregnancy (or overpopulation) is for…

I dont know you, but you used the word “extensive” properly so I must assume you are smarter than every person currently in the white house.