“Everybody wants to be a nigga but don’t nobody wanna be a nigga.”

Perinatal hospice care:

i know much more about thundershirts than i do about athleisure

I would like to announce I had no idea there are shirts for dogs who are afeared of lightening.

I’m so seeing that movie when it comes out. I don’t give a shit if it’s the worst movie in the history of ever. I just want to stare at giant, nearly naked Alexander Skarsgard. With any luck we’ll get to see some Skarsgard ass.

I’ll never tire looking at this man....

I didn't even get the Mad Men reference until my second watch-through (now I've admitted I've watched the whole season twice over the course of the weekend. Eeep)

WHO THE FUCK EATS CORN LIKE THAT. NO.

Will Ferrell rarely challenges himself but when he does (stranger thsn fiction being the best example) it can be amazing...

“met by all the aborted fetuses at the gates of heaven and they would thank him … for what he did because his actions saved lives of other unborn fetuses.”

But seriously, I just placed an ulta order and I ordered one of the NYX suede liquid lipsticks in a stone gray color. Pretty excited about that.

AND OBVIOUSLY RUPAUL

that’s so rude! FLUSH IT

I was really hoping the fundamentals were going to spell something out with their capital letters, like Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent.

I also can't name a single female writer that inspires me. I can't name a male writer who inspires we either. I am a sentient hunk of cheese that someone plugged directly into the Internet. I am inspired by mold and bacteria.

Prom 2001 here. Yep, It was frosted eyeshadows, chunky heels and frosty matching dresses in pastels.

I had hookworms as a kid. Tiny, white, wiggly worms that live in your butthole. I saw one sticking out of my poop one day and told my mom, who thought I was just being paranoid and told me to ignore it. Flash forward a few weeks later and it feels like my ass is full of broken glass. I go to take a dump, thinking it…

Finally I get to share my story publicly in a setting where people WANT to hear it!!! In December 2014, I started having really massive stomach cramps. I thought perhaps I had eaten something bad, or was PMSing, but these cramps were constant. I couldn’t sleep, I stopped being able to eat. I couldn’t stand up…

Given birth.