Front row at an NBA playoff game guy at a family dinner:

Wow, Anthony Davis is a dense as his unibrow.

Pictured: Devin showing how much money he will have after this is all said and done.

In soccer, a liver shot is called a George Best.

Hannah Keyser’s fiance: Inadequate Man

So my buddies are all starting to have kids and they realize they need a night out once every couple months for their sanity. They let their wives go on a wine weekend or whatever they do and they watch the kids, so when the wives/gfs come back they can have one night with the boys.

i highly doubt anyone’s balls dropped at this party unless they fell out of her purse.

The case against it, every one of my wife’s friends.

You are mostly correct, but it actually doesn’t apply to McGregor in this instance. The main eventers on the card get a percentage of the purse in addition to the deal. Secondly, they all individually negotiate their fight contracts, the Reebok money is ‘sponsorship’ money, at least as far I understand. Mostly they…

I know. Obama is soooo annoying.

Basketball would be better if the ball was a round screen and we could live tweet tweets right to the ball in real time so the dribbler could read the ball and become inspired to do more good kinds of shots. Imagine being passed a ball and right there on the screen/ball it says, from @DildoDunkins69: Hammer the…

I mean, its not the craziest thing to believe in. People think there is some mystical omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent being, meddling in human day to day activities, keeping a roll call of people and their transgressions that is floating in a realm that may or may not be in the clouds or another dimension...

Let’s cut the guy some slack on his day off. It’s not easy being a St. Louis policeman.

Best Group Messages in College Baseball.

“I don’t roll on SHABBOS!”

Man, dank is a chill as heck word.

Worked with Dale Earnhardt.

I guess you could say that fence is so tall, it’s two Story’s.

“Speak up, I’m at a movie!”

Pretty sure this was incorrectly translated. via a reddit user: