“It ain’t me, it ain’t me. I ain’t no military son, son.” - fortunate Son

Bayern and City could win their groups with 10 men

Tough draw for Arsenal.

God, I hate the Saints but Drew finally found a way to make one of these WYTS that is genuinely unenjoyable. I guess the upshot is he now gets to look forward to Cousins throwing the ball three yards passed Diggs in heavy traffic before yelling at him.

(Mourinho actually deserves kudos for the innovative system he approached the game with, and if his players had finished better, he probably would’ve strutted into that press conference gloating about how he’s still got it...)

Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!

That’s great, but who are the Pool Boys? 

It’s Billy. He was probably just confused, as paper is what Jack Wilshere’s hamstrings are made of.

A match against, on paper, one of the strongest teams in the division.

Right...because playing 90 in the DC heat and humidity and making a 50 yard run to make the key play is exactly the same as someone running a dozen steps after the 18th TV timeout. 

“Inarguably inferior Croatia side”?? What??? This is a team that survived two straight penalty shootouts before this game, destroyed Argentina like a college football team destroys a high school freshmen team, kicked the hosts of this World Cup out of the tournament, has an amazing amount of experience in…

The best thing is seeing how Jimbobs give the same rules- or style-based hot taeks on why soccer “is not fun to watch,” 24 years after 1994.

So Atlanta’s airport has a strip club now?

Even the TV listings threw some shade Belgium’s way:

Worth mentioning, Hazard absolutely deserved a free kick when he was tripped by Giroud outside the penalty area.

As an aside, I love/hate how European salaries are by week instead of year. I can’t wrap my head around, say, $100m/year, but when I read $750,000/week, it blows my damn mind.

teams are looking for the smallest of faux pas just to have an excuse to rush onto the field and perform some masculinity.

i’ll just go ahead and say it: anyone who stated that england was england is a fraud.

Osorio was right. Neymar has proved a terrible example for the children.