Dave Foley is my boyfriend.

I know this one, I know this one!!! Mr. Clean makes a Magic Eraser mop that's great for getting smudges and such off of hard-to-reach places. You can also make what I like to call a "swabbing tool" but rubberband-ing a rag over the bristles of a broom. Here's a video of me showing that technique and making a really…

That was a POWER MOVE, for sure. "fuck this claret"

Ok, but I really only like watching gay porn of either gender. What does that make me? Do the two dudes cancel out the two ladies? Or do they combine their gay powers? Damn you, Pat, you've made me question my sexuality and now I'm confused and...aroused?

+1

apparently there are some really strange people out there who don't consider stuff like [touching a penis through the pants, touching a penis]

He seems like a real keeper! I don't have any readable tattoos, but I'm sure I can balance a magazine on my back. Please send him over when you're done with him.

Damn, and I thought I was picky for wanting a non-smoker with a job who isn't allergic to my cat.

Every time Jezebel or Groupthink writes about online dating, I become more sympathetic to the whole process.

You're disgusting. How about you fuck off?

She is living out the dream of every burnout I went to high school with.

I am not terribly concerned about the 0.5% chance of chromosomal abnormalities past age 35, both because amniocentesis is outrageously accessible and because I have a basic understanding of numbers.

Almond butter and I are in a codependent relationship. It can't be good to go through a jar every week....OR CAN IT???

But how great is almond butter, though?

YEAH SINGLE PEOPLE FOR THE WIN!!*

LOOK, EROTICA-ESQUE TELEVISION SHOW, GET TO THE DIRTY STUFF OKAY?? THAT'S WHAT WE'RE HERE FOR.

I loved that. Oh look, I'm Jamie and I'm bored, I just want to stick my sword in Claire.

Him playing with that knife stopped me in my tracks. I'm pretty sure that was carefully directed/acted, and it was such a nice little touch in the scene. And smoking hot, too.

Sqweee! I only came here for the KNEE PORN: The perfect background shot of the man-child that is JAMMF and the promise of what lies just beyond the hem of that plaid.