You collect data, then reach conclusions, not the other way around.

Drunk Mario is an impostor. There's a cap on that Jameson bottle.

Fuck that guy.

[tips fedora]

At least they did reset the "number of days without a serious injury" counter to 0.

Sponsored by and for Crackers!

I don't happen to have a pen with me and this seems like your list, anyway, so it might be more appropriate for you to add it yourself.

HUNTER PENCE USES INTERNET EXPLORER.

'And if you're like me ...'

Just for reference, Clawson is a Republican Tea Party member who won a special election in his district, and was sworn in on June 25.

I think he is literally going to make the exact same argument he did on the show and not even realize it.

I love that he wastes so much time with tough-guy posturing, too. He makes sure we know he'll kick an ass if it touches one of his female possessions, though said possession could save him the trouble by rethinking her tone before it gets that far.

Such a shame to see Blackmon throw his career away to drugs. Why couldn't he just beat his fiancée instead?

"large in stature and athletically fit" is my new favorite euphemism for black

"Oh, she wasn't just pretending"

Janay Rice prefers the purple because it goes with everything.

Added perk, the size of the van provides ample distance between Jay and his unvaccinated children.

Birds, showing why we invented the word "birdbrain," don't have the visual or spatial acuity to tell the difference between "outside" and "a reflection of outside."

Pictured: Alabama's 2014 schedule