We got a king. Just gave Husband more room to conquer. FML.

The gall of the people indulging in eating out while about to lose their house/job. I say this as it started that thought in me but then I caught myself Pinkhamming and had myself taken out and shot

Evil coffee family:

Because they’ve been taught that this is how you act if you want to get your own way — by their parents, by the cashiers at supermarkets who are required to check out someone with a cart load of items in the express line, by the people who take line-jumpers before those who are waiting their turn, and by all the other…

do you know how many projectile pop related deaths there are each year?

ONES OF THEM.

I’m loving the Pinkham’s Law comments about the margaritas.

Surely he’d recall his identity after just one look at his monogrammed thermos.

“Hey babe, I’m taking you to your favorite! Ruby Tuesday’s!”

Moral of the story? NEVER fuck with the pizza man.

Well you see, vegetables can be crunchy, or red, therefore by extension, she was allergic to all of them.

There’s a new commercial on Hulu for United Methodist Churches that says “Church can happen anywhere” ...that phrase really scares me for some reason...like I’m going to wake up in my house, go downstairs, and there’s church going on.... gives me the chills.

And my axe!

“busy restaurant famous for it’s cheesecake located in New Orleans”

And my bow.

You have my sword.

See, (and there is no good way to say this, and I am sorry about that) this is a problem many transwomen (and transmen) seem to have in really heavily buying into a lot of romanticized gender role stuff that most feminists find to be complete creepy/gross/wrong (along with the mostly just annoying/wrong stuff like…

What I find awful is your complete lack of reading comprehension, your troubling desire to pick a fight with someone who has presented herself as an ally, and your clearly pathological need for attention. I don’t hate anyone. Not you, not your father, and not the people who are the subject of this discussion. I made a…

You’re creepy as fuck and type like you have a mouthful of marbles.

I’m not saying that she deserved it but if she’s gonna be out that late at night wearing that skirt... I mean I didn’t say she deserved it, I’m just sayin’.

That’s some high quality parenting.