Lena? Leave Michael B. Jordan alone unless he gives you enthusiastic consent, you icky little perv.

Men like that have had a very low humor bar set for them by life. They’re used to offended annoyance from the targets of their incisive humor stylings, and *THEN* — oh, but then! — they come back with the witty riposte, “What?! It was *just* a joke!” while their equally low-bar friends guffaw at the AMAZING WIT of…

I had been on vacation the whole week before and was sitting on the floor, watching TV and sorting through stuff, doing some final “while I have the time” organizing before I had to go back to the work grind when the news came on about it and of course that’s what I did the rest of the evening.

This is very much an, “If everything were different, everything would be different” mindset that is a bedrock of old-school conservatives. If everyone just did X then Y would not have happened and it doesn’t matter that the horse is gone and the barn burned down, their time-travel-based solution to the problem remains…

Imagine how much pain and suffering could be avoided if we just put these guys down humanely after the first incident.

Okay, now, what we got here, son, is a big ol’ case of Correlation, not yer, whaddya call it? Causation. I’d think a big city lawyer like you would know the difference.

I threw all mine out before my last move and I regret nothing!

Shocking. I’m so shocked by this shocking shock.

Yes, if we watched the footage edited to construct a narrative, we see the narrative that was emphasized by the editing!

You mean like they do every day no matter what anyone else does?

So don’t call people on their bullshit and evil because if you do they’ll be bullshitty and evil?

Is that tattoo supposed to look like a drop earring or was that just a (happy) accident?

Yeah, yelling at people adjacent to people who are actually doing shitty things is not anything that I give a shit about frankly. It just seems like people want to yell at somebody famous.

Yeah, that part does seem v murky now— but she publicly disavowed his behavior and was still getting hounded. I say, block away.

Sorry, but she fired him and he didn’t write this shit on her show but in his real life. Did I miss that she’s his mom? I don’t get what else is supposed to happen here. No one is entitled to anyone’s attention, even on Twitter, and why she should need to address or even listen to people yelling at her about what a…

Yup.

AHEM:

Oh, honey.

UGH, tone policing the severely traumatized should be a felony.

May all your severely traumatized outbursts be judged by strangers in the worst possible light. May everyone be smug at you in your hour of desperation. May your misery be repulsive to others and sympathy withheld due to your inability to be perfectly together in a desperate situation.