Oh, okay. I guess this is that moment I discovered Coachella has standards!

Well, the thing is, a lot of people are just fucking stupid.

I was late for French (2nd year college so everything was in French all the time), and said, upon entering class, "Pardonnez-moi! Beaucoup de traffique." Everyone nodded except the professor who laughed, and we all looked at her, frowning. She said, "En Francaise, 'traffique' est... drugs."

Wow.

He also said, helpfully, to get the nation to go to war, "He tried to kill muh dad!"

Not so much a specific excuse, but throughout my working life, I have been amazed at how often the same people would be sick on Fridays and/or Mondays over and over and somehow think people didn't know they were skiving off.

I swear, the people who think they're the super-clever first ones to make a fucking obvious joke to a server (or any customer svc person) are the same people who post comments asking if THEY'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO...?

I had just heard about this a bit earlier because I'm Twitter-friends with one of the guys who got attacked for having the same last name as Eleanor (he may also have been interviewed on Reply All). It was CRAZY the amount of shit he got with them demanding to know more about Eleanor (who they don't believe in) as if…

There is a very vocal and somewhat terrifying subgroup of the 1D fandom that is convinced that Louis and Harry are a thing and have hounded even people who just happen to have the same last name as Louis's ex-girlfriend online because they are also convinced that she is (was) a beard and/or entirely fictional because…

Your 1D prediction is dead on but I would add, "and Liam will become a successful producer." He is quietly and fully working on becoming the next Simon Cowell (or some super-polite, Liam-y version of Simon).

There are actually a lot of dudes who have shared their stories on here.

Sorry, but this is gross. I've read all these other stories and yours is the only one where the cheater seems to have had reason to fear she might be in actual danger. All you guys ganging up on her and not letting her leave the table was gross. Dump her, yell at her, confront her, whatever, but when someone wants to…

So is there a form we need to ask you guys to fill out? You know, you guys who cannot comprehend not saying everything you're thinking to strangers; who can't imagine that a stranger's life will be vastly enriched by you sharing your opinions, thoughts, or sexual desires?

I bet Bill Maher (thinks he) is fun at parties.

Yeah, silly her not normalizing violent verbal abuse and treating it like the criminal offense it is.

I don't think so. She repeatedly said she didn't want to be rude and didn't know how to react. He was her neighbor and an adult male who was helping her out. Yes, she was a fan, but I'm not sure what repercussions really needed to exist.

Tina Fey (via Matt Lauer) really nailed this one:
"I'm always amazed at what women will do because they're afraid of being rude,"

Ahhh, yes! The "If everything were different, everything would be different" argument that has made this country so very great.

I've never liked Chloe Sevigny and now I feel justified in my reflexive face-making in her general direction.

This is the BEST STUFF. I used to get major chapped lips no matter what I used — burts bees, carmex, whatever — big bloody split in my lip all winter. Started using this and have no problems since, going on three years now. I run outdoors in all weather and have zero issues with chapped lips.

This is the BEST STUFF. I used to get major chapped lips no matter what I used — burts bees, carmex, whatever — big…