There’s a Tara in every college class. She never shuts up about how crazy she is.

Oh Miley. Btw I can’t stand her fake hippie “come from a place of love” bs. She might believe it but I can’t actually tell how genuine she is, sometimes I’m like “right on Miley, don’t let the haters bring you down!” and other times I’m like “darling lets just be quiet for a min”. You don’t get to say who get’s the…

“When someone describes themselves as a taxpayer, they’re about to be an asshole.”

Fox News reaps what they sow. Suddenly they have no idea what to do with frothing at the mouth conspiracy nutcases and the lumbering behemoth of tea partiers. It’s like watching Mickey Mouse frantically try to control the brooms he’s accidentally brought to life as they completely wreck the place.

I've been using this one all day

I don’t know what republicans want. They don’t want women to be able to have babies they don’t want woman to be able to avoid having babies.

Back in 2001 I worked at Bath and Body Works at Lenox Mall in Atlanta, GA when Whitney and Bobby came in. Whitney bought over $600 of candles and lotions. Bobby picked out one thing - a fishbowl full of small orange goldfish shaped glycerine soaps. He wanted every single one we had for his daughter. I can’t stop…

Looks like he’s popping a squat to make his own fertilizer, and then I see the gun. Nice.

I guess Russia never heard about THE FIRST AMENDMENT!!

“I do not want any lectures”

Reposting, because fuck this noise:

The mistake you’re making is thinking we didn’t WANT to get caught...

1997, my mom a private pilot, my brother and I flew to a family reunion, from Seattle to Helena MT. We get there to find the entire family reunion had be relocated to a remote cabin. With no way to get there we hung out at my uncles house, and by out I mean outside in the yard until the family reunion returned the…

My wedding itself was a disaster, thanks to mommy dearest. Since the big wedding plans got cancelled, we were going to elope with just our photographers - we ended up inviting a few family members. ANYWAY. We went to a cupcake store while we were taking our pictures before we got married/met up with everyone, and…

Just a note to Pinkham: When I was 15, I started working at Baskin-Robbins. So behind-the-counter work, for $3.10 an hour (less than minimum wage in the mid-80s, which was $3.35, because small business/franchise or something? No tips). I hated it. I hated people. But my father knew an owner of the local Shoney’s (like…

I just want to clear a few things up as someone “in the know” about how airplanes and flight catering actually works.

The Tito’s/Tanqueray thing reminds me of this time back in my mid-20s when I went to this party my then-roommate’s friends were throwing. I didn’t really know the people at this party, but there was free booze, so whatever. I’m making random small talk with this dude who, it became quickly apparent, was a total…