Ken Bone, the undisputed winner of last night’s debate

This is the best escape since Sly Stallone eluded the Nazis by blending into the crowd after the final whistle blew.

I saw Dee Gordon’s home run Monday and became convinced there was a God. I saw Tebow’s home run today and began to rethink that position.

Can we stop disparaging coke users by linking them to Donald Trump?

“Even as Mr. Trump’s advisers publicly backed him on Tuesday and praised his debate performance, they were privately awash in second-guessing about why he stopped attacking Mrs. Clinton on trade and character issues and instead grew erratic, impatient and subdued as the night went on.”

Hi Lindsey. Do you know what it means to “Other” someone or a group of people?

Not many people know this but Milwaukee actually comes from an old Ojibwe word meaning “Yeah, but what about Black on Black crime?”

What an incredible moment, and if Bartolo happened to groove that for him, well that just reaffirms his status as the Champion of Everything.

Marshawn followed up the discussion of Kaepernick by asking where he could get some of those skittles that Donald Trump Jr. was tweeting about.

Whoa, whoa, are you trying to claim NFL owners aren’t trustworthy? I mean they’re rich so that automatically makes them superior humans.

It’s extremely Brownsian that they can’t even be the best at losing

He got fired when they moved to Baltimore after Modell promised he would keep his job, because Modell was human excrement.

I hadn’t noticed that, but it’s nice to finally have something to mock the Browns over.

Belichick took Cleveland to the playoffs in 1994 and led them to their last franchise playoff win.

And the Eagles surprise by going 7-9 or so in a shitty NFC East so the Browns don’t even get a great first rounder out of it.

I know it’s still way too early (and the Eagles were playing the Browns), but it would be the Brownsiest thing ever if the Browns made the smart move in trading away the second pick for a ton of future picks only to have that second pick (Carson Wentz) turn into a franchise quarterback.

Wide deceiver???

Sounds like my ex wife!!!