Fuck Jim Spanfeller

Fuck Jim Spanfeller

SAMER *yeets off planet*

He gets to stay because he’s related to sports, right? Everyone else has to go but dick balls Cub mascot can stay. On your way out someone leave a reminder to feed dick balls Cub mascot.

Jim Spanfeller looks like a guy who gives his niece lingerie for her birthday.

If anyone wants to hit up ole’ Jimmy Spanny himself and ask him what the fuck is going on, here’s his number! 917-881-5965

The clear preference for “fruit” vs. chocolate is some real serial killer shit, Kelsey.

I’m not a lawyer and I wasn’t trying to skirt libel laws. Let me be more direct... Jim Spanfeller is a daycare arsonist and murders the elderly for fun. And he takes pictures of his dog and posts them to Facebook with a minimum of seven hashtags.

I don’t know if it’s true or not, but some people are saying that Spanfeller and Maidment raped and killed a girl in 1990.  Again, I don’t know if Spanfeller and Maidment raped and killed a girl in 1990, but why haven’t they come out and said anything about it?  Why don’t they deny that they raped and killed a girl in…

Feel kinda bad that they’re going to have to put you down when everyone leaves here. :/

We may not all be as eloquent as Will at the end there, but I think it’s safe to say we all feel the same way.

Drew, is it true that neither Jim Spanfeller nor Paul Maidment ever had friends, a girlfriend, made any sports team, or has seen The Godfather? Is it also true that Jim smells like sweaty hobo taint and Paul smells like a urinal puck?

These dogs are most certainly more deserving of human compassion and love than say, Jim Spanfeller (who by the way, if you didn’t know, has an email address: jim@g-omedia.com). That stain deserves to hear why a dog is more noble and deserving of human love and affection than he is.

Can you let me know when you will be returning to sports coverage so I can go back to checking in once or twice per day? I have a lot to do today at work and all of these posts about non-sports topics are distracting because I Must Read Every Single One of Them. Whereas with the sports stuff I really only care if its…

The least interesting parts of this story are the parts that are about sports.

“Former USFL team owner Donald Trump went to a baseball game...”

In light of recent editorial directives for this site, the following comment will only be sports related:

Spanfeller and Maidment can fuck themselves with broken cricket bats.

Oh c’mon you know this time next week he’ll be claiming victory for Baseball being off the air because “coastal elites” booed him and now nobody will even broadcast them!

And despite your corporate overlords telling you to stick to sports, I hope Deadspin never does because

and I can’t emphasize this enough

I come to Deadspin BECAUSE YOU DON’T JUST STICK TO SPORTS

Worrying about what “plays into” whatever narrative he wants to spin is pointless. Have you even seen how much bullshit conservative media just spins out of thin air? And all in service of the guy who lies about damn near everything he thinks about. Even when looking at photos of his own inauguration, he lied about…