Nope, you lost me. Everything up to this point I could buy, but this is too much. The simulation is broken, reset the machine.

She’s taking the wrong lesson from those messages.

You know who else wanted to see everything treated fairly? Two-face. That was his whole thing.

Cool dude tell us more about what its like way up on that high horse

Miller wishes he had Zod’s hairline.

I can’t quite figure out why, but that second paragraph is one of the most scathing things I’ve ever seen.

Manny Machado does get to leave Baltimore in a month though. Trout’s stuck in LA for the next 2 and a half years

The fact that a high ranking administration official has to go out and explain how what they’re doing isn’t like what Nazi Germany did in the first place really says a lot about that administration.

The best part is that its not even really an “inane battle over semantics,” unless you mean that border patrol is arguing that the news should be *less* semantically correct when reporting on it. By their own admission, they actually are “keeping detained children in cages.” The reports are as semantically correct as…

Good

“I was at my daughter’s year-end Kindergarten event and they ran a story about my “plans to leave the WH” without even talking to me.” 

You’re right. Spending hundreds of thousands of dollars to open a location that will see customers one time a year for 5 hours is actually a good business decision.

I instantly buy this theory and will defend it to my incredibly wacky death.

just bring on fucking skynet already you sick android fucks

in the same vein, wouldn’t every shot taken by piggy-back steph curry be a 3 no matter where its taken from, as long as he got up on his teammate’s shoulders outside of the three point line? He never sets foot in inside the three point line while on their shoulders, so the last point where he was touching the ground…

I would like to go on record of telling conservatives that I, as a liberal coastal elite, would be really triggered if they shot their own dicks off. Please don’t shoot your own dicks off. My poor liberal feelings just wouldn’t be able to handle it.

Would I rather have [good thing] or [bad thing]? How is this even a question?

but actually. His name was all over the place when Manafort was originally indicted last year, to the point that when the news broke today, I went “oh yeah, that guy,” after not having thought of him for months. He wasn’t even a semi-unknown commodity prior to today like George Papadopoulos was when he was indicted.

I’m sad now.

Do the Red Sox-Pablo Sandoval method: Have real season ending surgery for a fake injury