A co-worker just told me Damon said he hates Jennifer Garner and doesn’t want her and Affleck getting back together. If this is true, he must be dying. He’s dying and he’s decided to burn shit down before he goes.

Your dog is adorable! This asshole is my mama’s dog. He is a jerk, but so cute.

Hello SNS! I’m pretty new to commenting, so I offer up my dog as a bribe to be my friend:

Hey Jezzies, what are you drinking? I’m drinking a Founder’s Centennial IPA. Not much of an IPA fan, but this one is pretty good. I’m watching trauma shows on the Discovery Life network that I DVRed yesterday, and they keep advertising this Ben Carson special with commercials in the style of a 50’s schlocky B-movie…

Don’t worry. I’ll disguise myself as critical respect and he’ll never find me.

“Guy comes in, put the gun in my ribs. And I just said, ‘I believe that you want the guy behind the counter.’”

I LOVE AMBER ROSE

Wow FUCK Kanye

Super shit news: this week I found out I have cancer.

Hi all! I feel like I rarely get a chance to participate in SNS in real-time. What’s everyone eating for dinner tonight? I had “snack dinner” - a handful of olives, some Kerrygold cheddar cheese, a couple grapes, and a GIANT glass of wine.

A man who turns down a poop emoji lady is a man who lacks a soul.

She does plan on filing counter-charges against Amy Rodriguez for beating her on the near post last night.

I feel you. This issue never fails to enrage me, which is why I posted the quote. For anyone who thinks, “Oh, just let it go.” Nope, I will not let it go.

I’m going to leave this here, for context:

I’d let Peter Dinklage spit anything he wants into my mouth.

The Scott Walker saga is sort of fascinating.

The tepid response to her awesome speech speaks volumes. Hollywood’s limousine liberals don’t like to be confronted with the truth.