This is such bullshit.

Hey, the picture got a cross-post to Jalopnik. So there’s that.

How many children they’ve fathered?

might want to grab all the Fiji water you can

The sky is falling... The sky is falling. You do realize what you wrote (or copy pasta’d) contradicts itself right? You raise the alarm and say...

This is the PERFECT instance of a reply bettering the original comment. Fantastic.

Seeing that it is Van Persie, my guess is that is an ambulance.

Piers Morgan is infuriated.

Too bad it’s not a 5s; if it were couldn’t they just mash his lifeless fingers on the home button to unlock the phone?