Thanks, Roger. Correction: 1 out of 4 Americans supported Nixon when he resigned because he was a crooked piece of shit.

Everyone please join me in a generous scoop of rocky road. It’s rocky road for sure.

And the shock of the creek water will jolt those zombie brides out of the false notion that a wedding guarantees a happily ever after. Some marriage therapist should get in on this with a buy one lost dress get one session free and cash in on bride nonsense. Separate transparent bank accounts being the first order of…

1 out of 4 American supported Richard Nixon on the day he was impeached. Let that sink in. People are stupid.

None of those gutless motherfuckers  wants to be Senator # 3 on record as a no vote. They are all waiting for some other chickenshit senator to cast the vote. I say chickenshit because I have every confidence that they’d all vote yes if it would avert the impression that they allegedly support anything that our…

Maybe apples to oranges, but I wonder how a person starved and tortured for 5 years as a POW, a person who suffered pain and anguish past anything most of us have endured, I wonder how he can still be a Republican?

I know, right? It’s not a deadness contest. It’s coming for all of us sooner or later (except Cher. Never Cher).

While some current members generally seem okay with it, some holdouts are definitely deflated. Yeah. I said it.

Work friends fade away and all you’re left with is a crusty old coffee cup and shiny shirts with unbearable shoulder pads. Wait, that’s me.

Fraternities hate being called frats., it bugs all the fratbros. Keep up the good work.

Don’t count out Jesus’ right hand man, Mike Pence. He is lurking now, just waiting for his chance.

It’s like watching the two founding members of the shit weasel club.

My day was fine, sport. It’s your life that must suck or wouldn’t troll a stranger about miscarriages. Now scoot on back to whatever it is you do for fun.

Well I can confidently say that you 100% seem like a judgy jerk.

I am Mary Jo Trump from Donald’s secret first girlfriend, Edna the cafeteria lady, in high school. I detest Cheetos and am the happiest Trump child.

I’m really to the point where the only thing I enjoy is that Turd Jr.s’ slimy lawyer is named Fuckerface (at least that’s what I’m going with).

Maybe get a job a Charlie Sheen’s life coach?

This paints a beautiful picture.

He’s going to need one of those dementia bracelets soon for when he wanders off. We really should just discourage that and let him wander off.

“Run along little Dmitri! Run ahead and zig zag a little, it’ll make it more fun.” What I picture Trumpturd Jr. telling a Russian orphan as he frees him on an island and hunts him for fun.